Beautiful Creatures: REVIEW

WATCH THE TRAILER

READ THE BOOK

She's the new girl in town.  He's the all-star, all-american boy-next-door.  He nearly runs her over while driving through the rain.  To make amends, he drives her home.  They fall in love, and live happily ever after. 

yeah, right.

She's the only new girl in town I've ever seen on screen where the mean girls hate her before they even know she's the girl they want to hate.  He's the only boy next door who looks great running for fun in the rain, AND reading through the banned book section of the library while wearing his expertly selected Ray Ban glasses.  

They truly are BEAUTIFUL CREATURES.  Based on the Novel of the same name by British Authors Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl, our romantic affair takes place through the eyes not of our Tragic Heroine, but our Everyman.

The story is set in Gatlin, SC, a fictitious Civil War-era town, that is so deeply rooted in Religion, it's almost silly. The city is "so far away from Charleston, they can't even get a Starbucks," and so far removed from the line of demarcation of Church and State, the viewer is forced to see what a tragic reality the movie presents. (Watching a teacher attempt to break up a group of girls from praying in the classroom of the High School is almost saddening).

So we meet Ethan Wate (Alden Ehrenreich), a true Romantic.  He wakes every night in a sort of West Side Story fog, with the sensation that something's coming. He's a true Rebel Without a Cause, doing everything he can to ensure his escape from nowhere.  

Junior Year begins for Ethan. Enter Lena Duchannes (an excellent Alice Englert), the girl of his dreams - no, really, she's the girl he keeps seeing when he's sleeping.  Is this a new form of stalking, we haven't heard much about lately? Slumber Stalking?

Anyway, she's a quiet girl with big beautiful eyes; she carries with her a sad sense that she's already got the cards stacked against her, sporting your typical misunderstood girl look a la Ally Sheedy, and an atypical tattoo on her hand. She might as well have a pony tail, paint-stained overalls and black framed glasses.

There's an awesome parallel reference to be made here.  The class is told to read "To Kill a Mockingbird," which is both cool and hilarious, mostly because it's a Ninth Grade reading level book, but because the first topic of discussion is its secretive neighborhood character Boo Radley.   

Get it?  If you don't, its probably because you skipped that one Freshman Year - shame on you.  

Audience's will love Ethan's sweet, puppy dog love and devotion; it's roots are so honest and wrenching, audiences won't know how to deal.  And to boot, his perfected SmallTown Southern accent will make most women, and some men wish he were moving bales of hay in nothing more than some sweaty over-alls for 95 minutes. 

SPOILER: it never happens. Sorry.

The pair finally cross paths.  Sparks fly, but Lena's incredibly eccentric and overbearing uncle Macon Ravenwood (Jeremy Irons) forbids the romance.  It turns out Lena isn't all she seems.  Like, not even remotely close. 

Turns out Lena, along with her very distinguished lineage are Casters.  What's a caster?  I'll make it easy:

"Calling a Caster a witch is like calling Smart people 'nerds' or athletic people 'jocks'," - NERDLY!

So, in Lena's world, on a girl's 16th birthday, she is claimed by one of the two opposing magical forces, the light or the dark.  What's worse, the women in Lena's family are victims to a terrible curse.  Should Lena fall in love with a mortal before her birthday, the dark will claim her.

Meanwhile, the wholly evil Saraphine (Emma Thompson) invades the body of the town's hat-wearing bible-thumping Evangelist, Mrs. Lincoln.  Her intention is to keep watch over Lena and ensure her transition.

So it stands, Lena will either be claimed for the dark, or, she'll be claimed for the dark.  Pretty good odds, huh? Not according to Ethan.  In what is arguably the most romantic monologue ever proclaimed by a 16-year old, he forces his way through a protective charm, marches straight to Lena and vows to stand by her side because he KNOWS a girl like Lena is good, that their love is real, and that she would never do anything to harm him.

It is at this moment I would like to point out - WHAT VAMPIRE EVER SAID ANYTHING LIKE THAT?

As the days count down, and Lena fears the inevitable, they turn to Amma (Viola Davis), Ethan's caretaker.  It seems there is much information she can share with the pair. 

I would be remiss to discuss one additional character with you.  Lena's incredibly over-sexual cousin, Ridley.  If you ask me, she is intended to depict what will happen to Lena should the Dark claim her.  What is that, exactly? Well, you get a Cherry Red Mercedes convertible, the ability to wear negligee as outerwear, fiery eyes - OH, and the ability to shed that image of "i'm the dead girl from Mystic River," and "I was Christine in the AWFUL Phantom of the Opera musical film," AND "I was Jake Gyllenhaal's nerdy girlfriend in The Day After Tomorrow."

Yep, that's right, it's freaking Emmy Rossum looking sexy as HELL, literally.

With there being such a heavy emphasis on events that took place during the Civil War, and the whole underlying issue of banned books,  it leads me to believe the movie (and book franchise) has something to say about letting people form their own opinions and make mistakes, or 'history will repeat itself.'  It's kind of a lesson we don't see much anymore.

And that's really all I can tell you.  I implore you - GO SEE THIS MOVIE.  It's beautiful locations, interior settings, special effects are only the tip of the iceberg.